23rd July, 2025 | By: Kummari Pranavi
“I can go from feeling deeply loved to completely abandoned in minutes — and I hate that I can’t control it.”
If your emotions often feel like crashing waves—sudden, intense, and hard to manage—you’re not alone. For some people, these experiences go beyond ordinary sensitivity. They may be signs of something deeper: Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD).
BPD is a complex and often misunderstood mental health condition. It’s marked by intense emotional fluctuations, unstable relationships, a fragile sense of self, and a deep fear of abandonment. According to the National Institute of Mental Health, approximately 1.4% of adults in the U.S. experience BPD in a given year, and nearly 6% may meet the criteria during their lifetime. In psychiatric inpatient settings, that number jumps to nearly 1 in 5.
Yet despite how common it is, BPD remains one of the most stigmatized and least understood mental health conditions.
Let’s meet Maya, a 24-year-old university student. She’s just started dating someone and feels ecstatic—until one night, he casually says, “I need some space.”
Immediately, her thoughts spiral:
He’s pulling away.
“I said too much.”
“He’s going to leave me.”
Panicked, Maya sends a flurry of apology texts, then abruptly ends the relationship before he can. The next day, she’s flooded with regret—she never wanted to break up. She just couldn’t bear the thought of being abandoned.
To outsiders, Maya’s reaction may seem “too much.” But for her, the emotional intensity is very real and very frightening.
Research shows that individuals with BPD often have a hyperactive amygdala—the brain’s emotion center—combined with a less active prefrontal cortex, which is responsible for impulse control and emotional regulation. This imbalance can make emotional reactions not only stronger but longer-lasting.
Thankfully, evidence-based therapies like Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) and Mentalization-Based Therapy (MBT) are highly effective in helping people with BPD build emotional regulation, strengthen relationships, and regain control over their lives.
Though research is still evolving, early findings are encouraging: It may help manage symptoms, but does not treat the root cause of anxiety.
If you or someone you care about seems to "feel too much," it’s not about being dramatic or weak—it may be a sign of deep emotional pain. People with BPD often possess incredible empathy, creativity, and emotional insight. They don’t need to be fixed; they need understanding, support, and tools to navigate the intensity.
Let’s stop labeling emotional depth as “too much” and start asking:
“What is this person trying to survive?”
“How can we help them heal?”